30 Observations from 30 Years of Marriage
The longer someone is married, the more they should be learning.
Learning means cognitive process of acquiring skill or knowledge; accumulated knowledge.
So what have Lori and I learned so far? A fair bit over 30 years.
In celebration of our 30th anniversary we went away on a 2-day vacation (to our favorite spot in Wilmington, NC). During this time we made a list of a few observations from what we’ve learned over the past 30 years.
30 Observations from 30 Years of Marriage
- It’s never too late to start over.
- Every day is a new day to love your spouse.
- Sex gets better.
- Your marriage can survive any size bed.
- Keep learning, then practice or share with your spouse.
- Shared joy multiplies exponentially.
- It’s OK to be goofy.
- Go away together often. (Without the kids.)
- Home – wherever you are together – is still the best refuge.
- Forgiveness works.
- Shared faith makes anything possible.
- Prayer preserves
- Deep prayer repairs.
- Laughter is a great reset button.
- You can never kiss enough. Or hug enough.
- When your spouse is your best friend it’s OK when other friends come and go.
- Do something daring together.
- Dream. Imagine. Talk about the future. Then plan it.
- Marriage grows when you serve together.
- Trust. It’s always worth it.
- Patience is the secret sauce of marriage.
- There’s no such thing as a bad meal… just a bad attitude.
- Enjoy your kids. Keep your spouse first.
- Phone when you’re going to be late – even if you don’t know when you’ll be home.
- Respect your spouse’s time. Ask what they are planning.
- Share what bothers you. (At an appropriate time.)
- Space is the final frontier. Sometimes your spouse needs some.
- Keep your marriage tidy on a regular basis. (It’s a lot easier than major clean ups.)
- Search for the positive. It’s the glue that binds you together.
- Remind your spouse, “We still have a great future together.”
And of course the learning continues…
What have you learned in your time of marriage (so far)?
Today’s value was selected from the “Knowledge-Skillfulness” category, based on the e-book Developing Your Differentiating Value.
This was cool to see since it was my post “11 Lessons Learned from my First 11 Years of Marriage” that linked Olivia and I through Lori’s blog, Encourage Your Spouse.
Number 4 was a cool surprise for me to read. Liv and I have stuck with a full-sized bed in our 13 years together. At first, it was because that was all that could fit up the staircase in our Army housing at Fort Benning. Later, it was because we were used to the coziness it created. We have been afraid that a king-size bed would create too much space between us. We love to cuddle. Hope that wasn’t too much information.
How is the cross-country trek coming along. School lets out for our kids in a week, so we’re looking forward to the time together with them but also working up ideas on how to keep them engaged all summer long.
Thanks for sharing, Jerry. I think a lot of people have the same concern about switching to a king-sized bed. I know we did, but we did it anyway. After 14 years with a king-bed we were concerned how we would manage switching back to a queen bed. Turns out we can manage just fine (and I like much better too!).
Enjoy the summer time with the kids.
Congrats on the 30 years!
And thanks so much for sharing with others what you have learned – both today in so many other times.
Thanks Paul!