Posted on May 2, 2012

Leading with Kindness

Leaders who care are kind. They tend to be very approachable and always considered fair.

Political leader Mahatma Gandhi. Christian leader Billy Graham. Basketball coach John Wooden. These great leaders understood the power of kindness.

Unfortunately, poor leaders view kindness as weakness instead of as a strength. Mediocre leaders tend to show selective kindness. They can be kind with some, and heartless with others.

While strong leaders are filled with passion, kind leaders know how to scale it. They understand everyone is at a different level – some are onboard, some not yet, some are partially engaged, and some are fully engaged.

Kindness recognizes trust takes time.

Not surprisingly, we tend to be able to evaluate quickly when someone is kind to us – and when they are not. But it’s not easy to explain why.

Kindness is a complex value.

The Value of Kindness

As a differentiating value, Kindness means warmhearted and considerate; humane and sympathetic; charitable.

The makeup of this value includes some strong attributes:

– Warmhearted: being friendly and generous.

– Considerate: careful not to cause inconvenience or hurt to others

– Humane: showing compassion and benevolence

– Sympathetic: showing or expressing sympathy

– Charitable: having a lenient attitude, or an activity/gift that benefits others

Note that kindness is not meant to be mutually exclusive. It is not a value to be embraced in the absence of others.

A leader who embraces the value of kindness might show their sympathy over a major loss you experienced, but then encourage you to move forward. Such a leader might appear friendly and considerate as you explain what you are currently working on, but then highlight the importance of how your efforts fit into the larger picture and what needs to change to maximize effectiveness.

For leaders, kindness is a value that can play either a major role or a supportive role.

Kind Leaders at Work

Kindness works well in a collaborative environment where leaders provide room for people to fail – and grow. The natural place for this occurrence is within a family. But it works in business too.

Kind leaders make the work environment constructive and fun. They work hard to create a supportive culture that encourages people to do their best.

Kindness works best with individuals who are motivated to succeed based on goals they have established themselves – which are always bigger than what others would set for them. In this case, leaders don’t need to be hard on their people because they are already harder on themselves.

For business leaders, William Baker and Michael O’Malley wrote a book “Leading with Kindness” that highlights how to use sincerity, honesty, and concern to get the most from people. The focus is on understanding the individual and possessing an appreciation for the unique gifts and talents that each person can contribute to the larger picture.

But if kindness seems to be too soft a value for you, then consider partnering with someone else who can embrace it and live this value around you. It’s important to play to your strengths while shoring up areas of weakness by engaging leaders who are strong in those areas.

That’s the kind thing to do.